How to Use Secret Language to Influence Others
Non-verbal communication is so powerful and we can use it much more to our advantage; this doesn’t mean in a manipulative way but more in a way that builds rapport with your team members.
People buy people first and they tend to buy people who are very much like themselves. Now, you can’t become exactly like one of your customers or a member of your staff. However, you can make slight adjustments to your behavior which will build rapport and improve communication.
Let’s say that you have a fairly strong voice or you speak fairly quickly.
If you’re communicating with a customer or someone in your team who has a soft voice’ or another team member who speaks slowly, then they may feel you’re a much different person from them and they may even feel intimidated. The obvious answer is to either talk with a soft voice or speak more slowly.
This is a technique is know as mirroring and it basically means behaving as closely as you can to the other person. Speak at the same level they do, speak at the same speed and with the same tone. This doesn’t mean mimicking the other person – this would quickly switch them right off you. It’s about subtlety becoming more like the other person.
Why do we not grow up speaking like children?
You can also learn to mirror words and phrases, posture, eye contact, facial expression and hand gestures. Some people say they feel uncomfortable doing this; however, they often mirror people unconsciously. Just watch someone talking to a small child or a baby. They crouch down to the child’s level, they put a soft smile on their face and they talk in a childlike way.
If we can do it with children, then we can do it with adults particularly if you want them to accept you and what you say.
Posted in: Customer service, Difficult people, Leadership, Management, Motivation, Sales